Do You Know What Your Problem Is?
by Vikki Anderson“Do you know what you’re problem is?” my brother asked me while on one of our many tasks for our elderly parents who had just moved into a two bedroom apartment two blocks from their home of 40 years.
“I have a problem?” I questioned.
“I’ve been observing you, and your problem is that you want to communicate with the whole world.”
“Is that bad? As a Gemini, I think that’s one of the nicest things you could have said to me.”
He shook his head.
We had been in BJ’s trying to purchase tires for my parents’ car. The young black man who was serving us had been waiting on a customer before us and he was new to the tire department, as he told us he was from dairy and a nurse by night, so he apologized over and over again when the cash register wouldn’t work properly or kept rejecting the other customer’s credit card. He received about 15 calls while we waited the half hour to be served. I offered to take the phone off of the hook or answer it myself. My brother, one of the best brother’s in the world, but a tad short on patience these days, was pacing the floor.
“That’s what you get when you want to save a few bucks when we could go somewhere else and get tires put on in five minutes.”
“Well, I am buying the tires, so can we just wait a little bit more?”
He started reading some of the product advertisements.
“Do you want to get the milk and coffee for mom and dad?”
“Not really.”
The tire salesman, Brandon, was so flustered and kept apologizing for everything and called for backup to see what the computer genius of the store could do to speed up the sales. The other woman and I could have been his mother and continuously told him not to worry and to just try his best. The phone kept ringing, and he kept looking up tire sizes and the other customer and I chatted about customer service in which we were both trained, and how hard it is to be put into a position without any backup or training and how unfair that was.
Finally, someone came from the front office and rang up the bill. I filled out a form for the tires and then gave them cash but needed change. The computer genius found that Brandon’s ID code was not working, so the money drawer wouldn’t open thus I was not getting any change. Brandon by now was walking the other customer to the garage where her tires were going to be put on, and my brother actually called to him and said, “Hey, buddy, don’t go far as we need change.” I am a very patient person in stores and I was amused to see that my brother was not.
We got the paperwork, change and picked up a few items that mom and dad needed and went back to my car. I had to drive him home and then later pick him up again to drive their car home.
On line, the cashier sneezed and I said God Bless You and asked if she had a cold. She told me it was just allergies and we chatted about a minute about our allergies and how this particular summer was horrible for our allergies and she wished me a nice day and off we went.
“Do you know her?”
“Who?” I asked.
“The cashier.”
“No.”
“So why did you ask her about a cold.”
“Just being thoughtful.”
“Do you think she cares?”
“I’m not sure, but I felt like seeing if she wanted to talk about anything, that’s all.”
“Maybe she didn’t want to talk to you.”
“But she did.”
“Don’t you think most people in the world would be better off if you minded your own business.”
“God, you sound like my daughter. She used to be embarrassed when I talked to others.”
“So, why do you waste your time and theirs?”
“I don’t think it’s a waste of time. For instance, Ann and I were coming back from the Nyack Fair on Saturday and there was an older woman wearing bright red pants with a great flower design and a nice white blouse. At the stop light, I rolled down the window and told her how great her pants were.”
“Why?”
“I felt she needed to hear something positive.”
“And?”
“Well, she then had a smile on her face when she walked up the hill on that very hot and humid day. I just like to communicate.”
As I pulled out of my parking space and started to leave the parking lot, a man actually cut us off to get into a spot right next to my car almost hitting us, but I had plenty of time to stop and didn’t react. My brother yells out, “This is when you should communicate to idiots like that” and gave him the finger. I too have been in those types of situations, however, I felt my brother was under so much pressure that it would be better for me to remain calm. I did tell him that many times I have also flipped someone the bird. He felt happier when I admitted that.
It was an interesting experience for me as my brother brought to my attention that I kept saying that I am not a morning person and I respond better and am more awake in the afternoon. He said I repeated that 3 times and being a Silva Mind Method graduate, I should know better, however, he was right. I told him so and thanked him for reminding me. That was something I was going to change for the positive.
My brother was actually a favorite student of Donald Yott who started the Metaphysical Center of New Jersey in 1956 and both he and his wife helped organize and type his books. My brother introduced me to metaphysics and parapsychology and that was one of the things I loved about him. As he got older, got a large house, and a family, he started to change to become more practical and organized and the metaphysical elements of his life faded a bit more each year. He continually says there is no afterlife and when you’re dead you’re dead, however, I assure him that he will be surprised once he does pass over.
I remember when my daughter, (now and married for 3 years), was around 3 and her favorite clowny which her grandmother had made for her was so dirty and I wanted to make it new clothes…Jaime, my daughter, would cry and wanted clowny’s purple outfit. She didn’t want another outfit. My brother was very close to her and I wanted him to talk to her, but he said to me, “If you are into metaphysics, you know that the vibrations on that outfit cannot be duplicated. She feels safe and sound with it the way it is, so you know you shouldn’t change it.” Wow, I thought. Yes, he was right.
I see my brother now overburdened with life, responsibilities of his own family, taking care of my house when I need him to, and the responsibilities of elderly parents who need us more and more each day. They don’t understand many of the forms that come in the mail, we need to go to stores that are far away from them as we don’t trust their driving any longer, and my brother, sister and I just constantly worry about their well being.
Am I wrong to want to chat with the cashier at the grocery store, the lady crossing the street, the person in line at the bagel store, the person looking for the right color of paint at the local paint store? I’m not sure. I’ve always talked to others and have been very comfortable with doing that, but according to my brother, whom I trust and love dearly, I am wasting my time. I don’t think I am as I feel connecting with each other on this earth plane or third dimensional life is very important. We need to know people care or we need to know that there is a ray of hope in life. Sometimes just one word to someone helps them through the rough spots and helps them take control of their life in a very positive way.
I do not apologize to my daughter for embarrassing her all of those years by talking to the lady behind me in the grocery store while we waited on line at so many stores. I do not apologize to my brother for chatting with and reassuring Brandon that we appreciated the fact that he was trying his best and didn’t have experience in tires.
I love to chat, I love to help and I try to do my part here on Earth. I think the problem would be if I didn’t talk, because then it would mean I didn’t think you had anything interesting to say or I couldn’t learn something from that person.
Do I know what my problem is? Yes, I am a Gemini who loves to talk, write and communicate with others. I guess the real problem is that there are 6 billion people on this planet and I don’t think I will have enough time to chat to all of them!!